29 July 2013
Jamie, Reading, in Galveston TX
A lot of what I have been thinking about lately revolves around identity. Who am I when I'm at home...
While in yoga class recently, the teacher was talking to us about this idea. How we tend to cling to ideas about who we are...and sometimes these ideas are wrong.
I went through a bit of this soul searching when I got my new iPhone, but I've been thinking about it more and more.
A little over a month ago I would have said that I was a sluggish shell of my former glory, living in my hometown and feeling lost after having just spent 7 glorious months living in the only place I feel truly at home...somewhere I feel my essence.
Today I am in California, training to be a health coach, doing yoga every day, and about to head down to Louisiana for a culinary arts course. I am also forming plans for my future UK return.
Our faces may change, but our essence remains the same (it's all very Doctor Who).
I still cling to old stories now and again. Right now I am harboring some fears about finding a job down in Louisiana. I'm not necessarily afraid of not finding one...I am more afraid of being treated poorly in the one I get. This is all stemming from the fact that all the kitchen or service related jobs I've had in the past were crappy. Why I'm choosing to look at the situation through a 16-18 year old's eyes instead of my (almost) 35 year old eyes is a mystery to me, but that is essentially what is happening. I am clinging to an old story.
So that means it's time to tap back into that essence and step into my next phase with positive energy and all the feminine power I can muster. After all, I do have a little bit more life experience and social skills than when I last ventured out into the job market.
Tomorrow I fly back East and see who I am there now.
XO
Who do you think you are?