04 March 2013
Heart on the Wall - Finlarig Castle, Killin, Scotland
I recently read an article about "Bone Knowing." It spoke to me on such a deep level. I thought, since I am to explore love this year…this can apply to love. And, as we all know too well, love can hurt, sometimes, at a bone-deep level. Love of all kinds...
Sometimes we can love so bone deep it hurts…and sometimes we hurt ourselves by keeping love out of our bones because we are afraid of that hurt. Whether it be while we love or after the love is gone.
I have found there is an equal hurt in holding the love back. It's sort of like when I am nervous to drive somewhere and I tense up every muscle in my body. I'm still getting to where I need to go, but not enjoying the ride AND all my muscles and joints ache when I get there. And then my mind is focused on the hurt rather than the Love.
I know that, in my life, I've wasted a lot of energy on the hurt (whether it's the aftermath or anticipation) than the love.
I wish I could declare right here and now that I will no longer do that. I can say those words but my brain sometimes defaults to the old ways…the knee jerk reactions. But I will declare that I shall try. That the next time I react out of fear I will stop, breathe, and love myself enough to ride the wave rather than seize up in anticipation of the hurt. I will make decisions based on love, not fear.
Because, this year, the word is LOVE.
XO
You can read the original article here: "Bone Knowing: Wisdom is Real"