This started out as a very different post. I was going to talk about how all the "New Year, New You" articles in my Facebook feed were exhausting me before I even got out of bed. Maybe my resolution should have been to shut off my phone. Then the inauguration happened and my feed became a very different place. I have never been a political person and I don't intend on using my Facebook or this blog as a place for politics (when I started my site I vowed that it would only house positive things) but I am recognizing the need for self care. More than ever...
I have enough day to day tasks to keep my plate full to begin with, and now there is this whole other weight of responsibility looming that I am still trying to sort out and find my place within. Our 100% will fluctuate from day to day, depending on where we are in that moment, but as long as we give our all (whatever that is at the time) we can feel accomplished. I have to keep reminding myself of this.
I put so much self induced stress on myself last year, and now that I am emotionally healing, I am allowing my body to do the same. I feel like this is a necessary thing for someone as quiet as myself, and with all the new outside stresses. I am trying to keep a sense of Joy and Gratitude through everything so I can have the energy to hopefully make a difference.
I've been getting back to my herbal teas, wrapping up in a warm sweaters and letting myself feel soothed by it. I'm enjoying singing again...listening to music more. Reading a real book before bed time. Spending time with Sam. Cooking nourishing food (and bringing it to work). Letting go of things that cause me pain. Trying to make room for better and healthier opportunities.
Also...ONLY doing things that bring me joy in my free time. I used to think..."I should do this and that..." and wished I enjoyed it. How crazy is that??? Now, I want to really look at something and evaluate if it will bring me joy. If not...I'm not doing it. I want to fill my free time with things that contribute to nurturing my authentic essence. Which is the only way to get to where you are meant to go.
I know this might surprise some, but I haven't been drinking beer (as much) for the last 8 months or so. Around June or July I realized how awful I felt after I drank certain types of alcohol...so I backed it off. Not because I wanted to be virtuous but because I didn't feel well afterwards...or even enjoyed it while I was doing it. Sad Face. I have been able to tolerate and enjoy certain drinks here and there. I just try and listen to my body while imbibing.
I have been noticing the simple things again, appreciating my friends and family...people who care and make me feel loved. I have been taking time, when I have the time...delegating things out when I can, (like getting my laundry done). I have been feeling joy for the little things I can do to hopefully make a difference in someone else's life...giving blood, donating money where I can, lending an encouraging word, sharing my heart and voice.
To quote my herbal teacher, Robin Rose Bennett, "If it's not enjoyable, it's not sustainable." And we are going to need a lot of sustaining throughout all the chaos.